Monday, February 14, 2011

February 14

Valentine irises
Card for Lauren
Valentine
Balloons
Valentine's Day always feels awkward and forced to me, and that, in turn, makes me feel a bit grinchy. A day to celebrate love, what could be wrong with that? But I never know what to write on the card.

Tonight I came across these words from Jen Lee: "I do not think of love as a stable substance. I picture us handling it with heavy mitts and tongs and trying not to drop it as we pass it around the room .... love is like the opposite of kryptonite -- it is the unstable substance that we cannot live without, in whose absence we wilt and our strength wanes."

This is how I feel right now, that it's a hot potato we are trying not to drop as we pass it around the room; I'm looking at it from the corner of my eye, so as not to let it burn a hole through my palm. Having to write about it on a card is too confronting, too defining, if I want to speak truth and not platitudes. It will crack me right open. And that might hurt.

So while I warmly appreciate flower deliveries and serenades, and while I can't stop making gifts and cards, this focus, in one day, on lovelovelove always feels somewhat embarrassing. Would anyone mind if I opted out?

3 comments:

deb did it said...

you have been excused. and we all know you love us, unconditionally, 364 days of the year!!! love ya Hashi!! toady and tomorrow....and then some!

Anonymous said...

Sure, it's okay. From someone who never opted in. Louise

Penny said...

all I can say is 'Typical Aussie' I think most of us feel the same as it is not really a part of our culture.
To top this post off the verification word is 'derds'!!!