I called Mum's ward, and got a man with a strong accent who said, I thought, "Your mother is sleeping now." When I got him to repeat it, he said, "My name is Sleeper (?) and I'm Helen's nurse." Turns out Mum was at the gym, which makes her sound much betterer than she really is.
I feel like a crumpled doily. Screwed up. Not doing my job of protecting delicate surfaces and looking pretty. And holey, definitely holey. Not sure how far I can take this analogy. I should probably stop now, and go to bed, which is where I want to be.